Styling And Shoe Review

READ EPISODE 5 HERE

 

"You are such an idiot, you are of no use to me Helen. I don't even know why I am still with you, if it is not that I feel sorry for you. What gives you the right to go through my phone? What?" I raised up my hands to protect my face as Kayode attempted to slap me again.

I was nineteen and in love with this twenty nine year old guy. It was my second year in the University and he worked at the bank as a marketer. He was my first boyfriend and the first man I gave myself to. I gave my virginity to Kay and with it, my heart, soul and senses. When we met, he was the best thing that ever happened to me. He was sweet and caring and treated me like I was the only thing that mattered in the entire world.

 

Read Episode 3 Here   "Femi, Feyiii, I don't want to get into the car before you guys, and please remember to put your bottle of lotion in the bag."   "Ok mummy". We replied in unison.       I can't describe the love I got growing up with my parents. It was comforting, it was uplifting, it was simply indescribable. It was just me and my older sister, Feyisayo, and they dedicated all their time, money and love to us, although with large doses of discipline to keep us in check. It was another family day out and this time we were going to the beach. Every Saturday, my parents made sure we did something together as a family.             No, we were not your typical spoiled rich kids, I remember that at the age of four, my mum would make me climb a kitchen stool to wash my plate after eating. We practically had to do everything by ourselves. Any maid that was employed had no business minding our business.           We grew up in love, lived in love and we were taught to show love. We were more than comfortable, we enjoyed the luxuries of life, we had the best of everything, but my dad made us understand the value of money and how to earn early in life too. For anything we asked for outside our basic needs, we were made to work for it.       Looking back now I feel like they knew they were going to leave us too soon and wanted us to be able to survive the harsh realities of life. Feyi and I were really young when we lost our parents but they had taught us enough to keep us going for the longest time.           "The earlier we bury them, the better o sister mi. Let us all move on with our lives. I know it is painful but for how long will we leave them in the mortuary?". My mum's older sister Aunty Tolani said, as she tilted her head gear to the side.       "I see reason with Sister Tola, Aunty Mobola , their younger sister said. I don't know why Uncle Layi's friends are making such a fuss about the whole Ikoyi Vaults. Is it the location that matters or that the dead is buried?"       I listened in anger as my mum's sisters and cousins talked about burying our parents like they were going to bury stray dogs. My dad was an only child and an orphan and save for a few of his cousins and his close friends, he didn't have much of a family. I grew up knowing my mum's family as the only extended family we had and now the decision as to what will happen to us was in their hands. We weren't exactly close to any of them as they were quite lousy and aggressive in their ways. My mum had been the only different one from the lot.       My dad's best friend and two of his cousins opposed all the lousy suggestions my aunties made concerning the burial, and did everything within their powers to give my parents the most befitting burial they could get. Watching the pall bearers lower their caskets into the ground and making Feyi and I pour sand on the caskets as the Pastor performed the final burial rites, I felt a chill from deep inside and a sense of emptiness. Real fear overwhelmed me.               I looked beside me to see my sister, she looked numb and unaware of her surroundings, she looked like she was in a trance. I was just ten years old but I felt years older and I knew that things will never be the same again.       The day right after the funeral, my dad's best friend, Uncle Segun, two of his cousins and my mum's sisters Aunty Tolani and Aunty Mobola held a meeting at our house.       "We can't say thank you enough for standing by us during this very rough period. Aunty Tolani started, we appreciate your support and the show of love. A ni fi iru e san fun ra wa o (You won't experience such sorrow as payback). At this point we need to think about these children and take decisions concerning their future."       My heart skipped many beats as I listened.         "You can't be thanking us, Uncle Segun cleared his throat as he started in reply. Layi and Bisola were more than friends to me,  it's my loss as much as it's yours and the well being of Feyi and Femi is as important to me as it is to you."       Nothing had been said, but I couldn't shake off that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. As I looked at all the faces in the room, wondering where my sister and I would end up, Uncle Segun seemed the only person that signaled any form of hope of a happy future. They asked Feyi and I to excuse them while they continued with their meeting.           "I'm so scared Femi, what do you think will happen? Are we going to leave the house and move in with one of them?"  Feyi asked me, as she started to cry again. All she seemed to do was cry and it was okay with everyone. I on the other hand wasn't allowed to cry. I was told I had to be a man, I had to be strong for my sister.     "I pray we would be allowed to stay with Uncle Segun if we have to leave the house, at least I'd get to play video games with Sesan." I said in reply.           I guess God wasn't answering prayers at the time. The final decision had been taken and we were going to move to Aunty Tolani's house, our house was to be locked up until they took a decision on what to do with it. We were to pack our things and get ready to leave the following day.         I remember Uncle Segun didn't look happy as he left after the meeting. As we walked him to the car, he promised to call and visit us often enough and also...

READ EPISODE 1 HERE     "Baby, will I see you tomorrow?, I'm missing you already".     "I'd call you, I have to go now, I'm running late for my meeting" I held out the envelope of money to her and waited impatiently while she touched up her face. I leaned back as she tried to lean in for a kiss and faked a smile.       She was happy to take the envelope, I was happy to see her go.       I tried to find my way to the Ibeno beach, that's where the therapy session would be taking place today. Great choice by Yemi I must say. It had been a long week and an evening at the beach front was all I needed. It wasn't my first time in Uyo, but the first time I'd be staying longer than a weekend.       My name is Felix, I'm forty five years old and a Senior Manager at one of the top Consulting Firms in Nigeria. I am in Uyo on official duties and would be staying in town for about three months. I was having lunch at the Le Meridien Ibom Hotel the day I arrived, when I met Yemi and a group of other guys while we exchanged banter on the Premiership League. I got to find out he was a Therapist when we exchanged business cards.         Two nights later, I had brought Sharon to the restaurant to have dinner before taking her to my hotel room. We ran into Yemi and exchanged pleasantries. For the first time, I was conscious of the fact that I couldn't properly introduce Sharon to him as she wasn't my wife. I felt embarrassed and ashamed. I knew then I needed help. I called Yemi the following day and he was sensitive enough to have read through my shame the night before. He told me about a group therapy session he was putting together and that's how I got to be a part of it.       In my Bermuda shorts and crisp white shirt, I walked down the beach trying to locate the group and it didn't take long before I found them. Everyone looked a lot more relaxed than the first meeting. We had gotten to know a bit of ourselves even though we hadn't established the various reasons why we were there.             I took my spot on the floor beside Helen after saying hello to everyone and apologized for being late. I couldn't help but notice her shoes, a pair of  Valentino espadrilles. I had gotten my wife the same pair on my last trip to Italy.                 "I'm happy to have you guys here and I'm really excited about going through this journey with you. You all know my story and my deep struggles with drug addiction. If anyone had told me I'd make it out alive and sane, there's no way I'd have believed that, but look at me now, ten years and counting, free from the bondage of getting high. Like I always say, the first step to freedom is acknowledging that you need help. The fact that you made the decision on your own to be a part of this session has freed you from whatever you are going through."        I tried to listen as Yemi spoke but my mind wandered away to the early years of my life.         "Have you seen my mummy, I'm looking for my mummy" I cried as I walked around the compound asking everyone I came in contact with.       "You're looking for your mother, where else can she be na, ashawo wey leave pikin go dey freak with another woman husband." That was the response of one of our neighbors to me.       I was about seven years old at the time. My dad died when I was five years old, leaving me at the mercy of my wayward mother. I had heard over and over again how it was her promiscuity that led to the heart attack that killed him. I was an only child, so I practically grew up on my own.         I walked back quietly to the front entrance of our flat and sat out there while I tried to do my homework. I was hungry and needed to pee but had no access into the house. I slept off and it must have been over two hours as it was starting to get dark, when a Green Volvo car drove in. I got up slowly from the bench as I watched my mother shamelessly plant kisses on the neck of the man behind the wheels while he fondled her breasts and gave her an envelope.           I peed on myself.         *****************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************           The beach front is supposed to be peaceful, serene and the perfect place to relax and let go of all your worries, but the memories I held of the beach were a complete opposite. I remember pain and tears, pain from the sting of the cane on my bare back, tears of hopelessness and the need to run far away from the people that were meant to protect me.         My name is Helen, I am forty five years old and a successful Fashion Designer. My designs have been to the runways of Paris, Milan, New York and London and grace the closets of top celebrities around the world, but not many people recognize me as the face behind my brand. I have a team who represents the brand at every show. Creating designs is my escape from the reality that is my life and so I put in my all into every piece of work I make. Fashion is my thing and not only do I create my designs, I dress the part in the most subtle ways.                   "Good for nothing girl, you can't amount to anything, are these the results your mates are bringing home?" I cried as my father threw my report sheet in my face.       "I'm just tired of this girl, see ehn Helen, you will not disgrace me in this house. Go and wear your shoes, let me take you to prophet for deliverance. You need it, three days with the blessed man...

READ PREVIOUS EPISODE HERE

      Following my experiences with Adeyinka, my lover at the factory when I worked at Foot Garden, my affair with Uncle Wale and my broken marriage, I had learnt not to put anything past anyone. People go through life in different ways and life just happens to happen. But growing older has made me understand that I am responsible for my choices.         I wouldn't say I was shocked when Rahmat announced her affair and intentions to get a divorce. She never really talked about her marriage, but I have always felt she was too intellectual to be in a polygamy setting and not with a crude man like Alhaji Abubakar. What surprised me was how she had managed to keep the affair a secret, but then again, I should be the least surprised, my affair with Uncle Wale still remains a secret.        

READ PREVIOUS EPISODE HERE

      We all knew Rahmat's decision to leave her husband wasn't going to be a walk in the park. I couldn't get over her announcement that afternoon at lunch with the girls. She didn't talk much about her marriage but I safely assumed she was happy. To think she had been having an affair for 2 years and she had been able to keep it so discreet, that was another level for me. I wonder who this guy was.         I was in a no judgement zone but it just made me question a lot about life and people and choices and my conclusion again remains, do what's best for you. Rahmat looked really beautiful in her full length dress. Abubakar left no stones unturned to make sure he did everything she'd want to have the best party ever. There were top government dignitaries and business moguls to share the day with her.      

Get Up To Date With The Series

Click on the links below

     
  1. INTRODUCTION - SIMISOLA OBE

  2. INTRODUCTION - BELEMA OPREH

  3. INTRODUCTION - AMANDA OBIWURU

  4. INTRODUCTION - RAHMAT ABUBAKAR

  5. EPISODE 1 - TIED TO THE PAST

  6. EPISODE 2 - FREE FROM THE PAST (PART 1)

          *****************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************         I had 'fallen in love' with Uncle Wale, every inch of me knew it wasn't right, I was dying on the inside of guilt. Simi and her mum, most especially her mum did not deserve this from me. I struggled. Every morning, while I prayed, I'd vow to end the affair, but it never happened. The moment I saw him, my resolve would disappear. He became everything to me and he was such a kind lover, understanding, patient, gentle, generous, funny, a sound board for all my crazy ideas.              

Pastels have been around for as long as forever but became a high trend in fashion in the past 3 seasons. In the bid to experiment and be more flexible , I will be investing in a few pastel colored pieces.     For those that may be wondering, pastel colors are those soft, neutral, soothing, 'de-saturated' shades of all your favorite colors. Think Baby blue and pink, mauve, mint green, nude, lavender and so on. They're usually pale but I find them a very unique way to stand out in style.          

I am so happy to be back at this with the E Interviews, last year was a drag and getting the interviews in was quite an issue. Not relenting, I will go all in to bring you the best Interviews and Style features from your favorite fashion people as well as underrated fashionistas that should be in your line of fashion vision.
Petite Derin Odugbesan is an Isale Eko (Downtown Lagos) PR girl and Top Style blogger who loves Fashion, Style and Travel. It is her love for bright colors and hues that drew me to her Instagram page (@derinfromisaleeko).

  Happy Nu Yearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr - My grin is wide, my voice is hoax and I am, as always, very excited to get in my first blog post for the year Twenty Nineteeeeeen. After a short but interesting holiday, it's safe to say your favorite #shoelover and fashion enthusiast is back to what she knows how to do best. (*WINK*)