On The Radar…Footwear Designers

READ EPISODE 2 HERE   "My pretty Misan, oya come and sit on my lap, let me show you something."  I walked slowly to Uncle Mike and did as I was told.       He was our next door neighbor and one of the nicest. He didn't used to yell at us like his other brothers or send us away when they were playing video games. By us, I mean, the other kids in the compound and I.       I grew up in a pretty decent neighborhood, I would say middle class standard. My family wasn't rich but we also did not lack, my father could afford to give us all the basics. I grew up with two older siblings, a brother and my immediate older sister.       We lived in a block of flats housing about ten other families and we all related freely. My dad was a civil servant and my mum a trader. We lived a regular life. My dad would usually get back home at 7.00 pm on the clock, he was never late or too early. My mum would return at 6.00 pm to get dinner ready for us and in time for my dad. It had been the routine since I was born and nothing changed even up until I got into UNI.         I had many play mates in the compound and some of us attended the same neighborhood school. We also had older neighbors who we called Uncle and Aunt as a sign of respect. Some were in Senior Secondary School while some had gotten into the university. My older brother was one of those in Secondary school when I was in Primary school. It was one big family and it made growing up so much fun. But in the midst of the fun, I got robbed of my childhood and innocence.       Uncle Mike was waiting to get admission into the university and I was due to write my Common Entrance Examination. He volunteered to tutor me so that I could get an excellent score and be admitted into one of the Federal Government Colleges of my choice. I was an intelligent child, book smart and very brilliant. But with my parents, there was no end to knowing, so it wasn't difficult for Uncle Mike to convince them of my need for a tutor.       I was properly balanced on his thighs and while trying to explain the concept of Highest Common Factor and Lowest Common Factor to me, he slipped his right hand in my panties and started to rub my vagina with his index finger.       "You know you're so special Misan, really special, you're very pretty and intelligent and also very mature. You're different from the other kids. You shouldn't even be playing with them, you should spend more time with me so I can show you things and teach you things for your level" As he said these things, his voice changed and got softer and I could feel something hard against my body from his trousers.     It was a norm, everyday after school, I would drop my bag in the house and go for math lessons at Uncle Mike's place for two hours. He tutored me as he promised, but he taught me a lot more than math. I was nine years old and my body had started to blossom.       It started with him rubbing against my vagina and playing with my breasts, then it advanced to getting me naked and using his mouth and tongue to suck my nipples and lick my vagina. Initially it felt strange and I knew it was wrong, I would try to resist and even told him I will tell my mum, but he would ask me to relax and stop acting like a baby, he was so gentle and calm and soon it started to become pleasurable and I had become very comfortable with it.       He would tell me all those sweet words and buy me treats. He really made me feel special. Nobody raised an eyebrow, nobody questioned why we were so close. See, Uncle Mike was the leader of the Youth Church Choir where most of us attended, he was the most hands on person in the compound and the one every adult will call to for help. He was always available, never complained and wasn't part of the 'bad boys' who smoked cigarettes, drank alcohol  and partied. Everyone loved him.         He made sure I joined the Children's church choir and would teach me how to sing so I could take major roles when we had a ministration in the adult church. Behind closed doors he did much more. While touching and fondling me, he would ask me to close my eyes so I could feel everything he was doing to me, he said the only way he would be sure I was enjoying it was for me to moan. He taught me what a moan sounded like. Sometimes, I would get to moan, other times I would pretend. But the sound I made always got him excited and he would make me watch him as he rubbed his penis back and forth vigorously till some whitish thing came out.       The first time he did that, I almost screamed for help. I thought he was going to die. He kept jerking and it looked like his eyes were rolling inwards. The only time I had seen that was on TV when a man was about to die in the movie I watched. He laughed when he saw my expression and told me I had given him the most precious gift ever. Our 'relationship' grew to a whole new level.         At this time, I had now gained admission into Secondary School. I ended up going to a private school close to the house. My mum had insisted, even though I had gotten admission into three Federal Government Schools in Sagamu, Benin and Suleja. She said she wanted to be able to keep an eye on me and be sure I don't get 'spoiled' in the midst of strangers. Uncle Mike and I laughed...

"Welcome to Room 88, once again my name is Yemi Ogundare and I am happy to have you all here. I believe we have all read the code of conducts and we are ready to abide by the rules guiding these sessions. Please I'd like for everyone to feel comfortable with each other, we all came here for a reason. We are here to find healing, to gain knowledge and strength to live in and enjoy the present and to build the courage to the face the future. Consider this your safe place."       I listened, as this young, dapper looking man addressed us. There were five of us in the room. The only other female was on the sofa almost opposite mine, she looked like she was in another time space. She was definitely not with us. She couldn't be more than thirty five or at most forty, but who knows, these days where the sixty year olds are giving the young ones a run for their looks. She obviously had a high taste in fashion, simply dressed, but with intention. On her feet were a gorgeous pair of Maryam Nassir Zadeh Canary yellow sandals wrapped neatly around her ankles. I looked away quickly before she turned to look my way. I didn't want to be caught staring.         I shifted my gaze back to Yemi and reminded myself why I was in the room. I know I need help, I can't continue life the way it has been. Not after my fall out with Tonia, I betrayed her trust and the guilt is drying me up from the inside. I have never felt as empty and hopeless as I feel now. Nobody who sees me will know the demons I am faced with and these demons have succeeded in destroying me. I have become a threat to humanity and it is these feelings that drove me to almost taking my life three weeks ago.       My name is Misan, I am thirty eight years old, a petrochemical engineer and a night club owner. I make bold to say that I have it all - property, cars, an ever evolving luxury wardrobe and everything money can buy, literally. I have always been an intelligent and smart girl, an A Grader right from elementary school, always coming up tops through to the university and even on to my Doctorate Degree.         [caption id="attachment_44205" align="aligncenter" width="596"] Misan[/caption]       You see, marriage has never been a thing for me. I have been in relationships, good ones and bad ones but getting married has never really been a priority. Some people will say it's because I am too independent and financially stable, but the truth is, it just isn't a desire. Don't get me wrong, I am not against it, if I find someone, I would be willing, but I am desperately searching as everyone is expecting of me.         On the other hand, I love children, I absolutely adore them, I love having them around. For years now, I have been a caregiver in my church at the Children's department. I have been made god mother to all my friends' kids and when they need time alone or have to be out of town, I am always their go to person to look after their kids. I desire to have children of my own and it has been my plan to get pregnant by artificial means if I wasn't married by forty.         I don't know how I got to this dark place, I don't know if I can be healed of this menace. How do I bring up a child under these circumstances?         "I see that some of us are lost in thoughts, nervous and anxious. Don't worry, one step at a time, we will find healing, I assure you we will. As long as we have come on our own to seek for help, we have taken the most important step of this journey. I want us to see each other as a support system to the other person and as our stories unfold, we'd find comfort with each other as we try to connect the dots. Can we start by introducing ourselves? Anything you'd like us to know about you."       ******************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************       "My name is Oluwafemi Akinrimisi, I am forty two years old, married with three kids, two girls and a boy. I run a logistics company of my own while I work as the Human Resources Manager at Centurion Oil and Gas Limited. I'd say my life is almost perfect, I wish it was perfect. My business is thriving, doing really well. I am at the peak of my HR career. I have a wife that loves me to bits, my kids are awesome and well rounded, but I am the problem in this picture and that is why I am here, to seek help. I need help."       [caption id="attachment_44250" align="aligncenter" width="627"] Femi[/caption]     The tugging in my heart was unbearable, as I felt the tears start to well up, I took a seat and allowed the next person introduce herself. It was a small room, small enough to feel cozy and comfortable but very well decorated and organized not to make you feel claustrophobic. I crossed my left leg over the right knee as I adjusted in my sofa. We were not allowed to use our phones, so I kept fidgeting with my fingers. My mind flashed back to about thirty years ago.         "Femiii, Feeeemmmmmmiiiiiiiiii, sho n ka mi loun ni? , didn't you hear your name?" My aunt yelled out from the kitchen.           "Mo n da yin loun ma" (I answered you ma), I replied as I ran into the kitchen but before I could say anything else, the back of her left hand had connected with the right side of my face. I looked down, it was normal. I would have been surprised if that didn't happen. It was a part of the routine.         "Where is the pepper I asked you to blend ehn, I left this house with instructions that everything I need to make this stew, must be ready...

My favorite way to pass time is on any of the Luxury online stores, ogling shoes. I find it very relaxing when I take in the details that come mostly with luxury shoes. And in the past few days, I have come across some absolutely gorgeous foot candy that I have to share with you guys. They are season appropriate, party show stoppers and would set you back more than a few hundred thousands. But if you have worked that hard, can afford them and love your shoes, then they are worth every penny.         The colors that come to mind the most when I think of Christmas are Metallics (Bronze, Gold, Silver, Pewter), Black, Red, Green and Blue. They get me in the Christmas mood and most designers tend to work with that too. This season has seen a lot of amazing designs in these colors and here are some of my favorites.        

Catch Up On The Last Introduction Here

 

Narrating: Miss Amanda Obiwuru (Age 40)

I remember the days I'd cry when I drive over a piece of paper or plastic, feeling bad that I had crushed it. Same me, in the same breath, would cuss and get in a blind rage just because someone unintentionally spills water on the table. I have been a bundle of erratic emotions, but I am getting better. I believe I am, in the past 4 years, there has been a lot of progress. I feel like I am no longer tied to the past.    

I'm a big fan of the Sex And The City Series and that is where my love for shoes and fashion generally started to manifest. Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) literally killed me with every shoe moment. Best part was when Big proposed to her with a pair of Manolo Blahnik 'Hangisi' pumps... *sigh*. The best.  

With a wide range of rich and distinct colors, textures and styles, Zara is serving us major shoe envy with their 2018 Fall Collection. Think Metallics, Bright hues, Distinct heels and a combination of textures, your closet is about to be popping with shoes ranging from about 25 pounds (N13,000) to 100 pounds (N50,000) per item.   Whether you're on the low end of the continuum or tending towards the higher side, Zara has fit every budget in view. Oh and the best part is that they have sizes up to a U.K 9 (EUR 43). They remain the go to brand for the  fashionista on a budget.  

From Emerald to Olive, Kelly, Lime and Chartreuse, there are many gorgeous shades of Green shoes that will make anyone go green with envy. Green is undoubtedly my favorite color in the world especially for fashion pieces. It's sales season in many retail stores - Luxury and High Street, and with new season collections being released, i want them all in green.

It'd take a long time to get over this fairy tale between Meghan and Harry. Oh and by the way, my choice of Aquazzura didn't make it as her wedding shoes, but we did get a place for the reception party. Now that she is the Duchess of Sussex, Meghan has a whole lot of rules to follow, to keep in line with the monarchy.